Who’s in Charge of Our Happiness; Who Should Be?

I’ve never been one to do what the majority of people consider to be the right thing.  The more mainstream something may appear the greater chance that I’ll walk in the opposite direction.  Not always, but I’ve learned the importance of putting myself first.  Life is short, and at the end of it the only person who we need to answer to is ourselves.

WE DON’T OWE ANYBODY ANYTHING

I love to travel. Especially throughout the United States to experience different cultural views within our culture. I lived in Southern California for about a year. Talk about a subculture within a culture. There was such an amazing vibe there. From the always sunny weather to the always laid back people, it remains by far one of my favorite places  in the United States.

When my ex decided to book a flight back to the east coast for her and my daughter without telling me my life began to spiral out of control. That period of my life became one of my darkest, but it led to some of my greatest growth. I was working for a company which I didn’t want to leave without giving notice. My perception was quickly changed by a SoCal friend.

He was born in Mexico and moved to Los Angeles with his family when he was kid. He Married his wife from Columbia, and they moved south of LA into Riverside County to raise their three sons.  A month before my ex and daughter flew to NJ he received a phone call that no parent ever wants to get. One of his sons had passed away. He was only in his 20’s.

In his laid back Southern Californian/Mexican accent he said to me, “you don’t owe anybody anything.  Your daughter needs you. When you leave they’ll find someone else and the show will go on.” The next day my bags were packed and by midnight I was in my car driving back to NJ. The company I worked for didn’t crumble, and me leaving was soon just a dusty memory for them.

CHANGE IS POSSIBLE

We become very complacent in life. Our relationships, personal and work, become who we are. We believe without them our existence would be in jeopardy. We stay in situations that make us sad. That make us cry. That even make us believe we’re the crazy ones. We know deep down inside we should run and never look back, but we don’t.

Why?

Fear of the unknown. We fear what our life might be like on the other side of this darkness. We fear what the person/people who are disrupting our happiness might think about us. We live our lives more concerned with other peoples opinions than our own well-being. We stop caring about ourselves, and we make excuses for our unhappiness. Most of us spend our entire life doing this. Only to reflect and ask what if as we take our last breath.

WHO’S LIFE ARE WE LIVING

The longer we remain in a volatile situation the harder it is to get out, and the lesser the possibility comes for us to do the things we’re truly passionate about. We owe it to ourselves to change. We get one life. One shot to be friggen awesome. Why throw it all away for average?
Why settle for unhappiness?Blog_Settle

Happiness is a choice. So is it’s opposite. How we feel is entirely up to us. If we’re working at a job that makes us feel inadequate, we should find another job. If a romantic relationship is no longer feeling romantic, we should look to start a new one. Or better yet, try being single. Being single the past five years have been the most productive of my life.

We don’t need anyone or anything to make us happy.  Once this is realized, true happiness can be obtained.  It is possible, but we must first accept the fact that we are good enough for ourselves. We don’t owe anyone anything.  Walking away from a bad situation doesn’t define our lack of character, instead it reminds us that we are important.

Remember, with or without us, the show will go on.

Is there a situation that you stay in, because you’re afraid of what awaits you on the other side?   



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7 thoughts on “Who’s in Charge of Our Happiness; Who Should Be?

  1. Thanks for sharing a bit more of your life Seth. A well written and thoughtful post with lots of wise words to ponder. You’re absolutely spot on, we get one chance at life, so we owe it to ourselves to live it authentically.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. “Happiness is a choice.” I love this. Good for you for going after your daughter. You will never regret that. What a good friend you have. I was working full-time at a university, but it was putting a strain on my family with my husband’s schedule and with 4 kids. I opted to go part-time. I felt bad, like I was letting the school down. The school carried on (like you said…the show kept going). My Dean told me something that I will never forget. “No one goes to his death bed saying ‘I wish I would’ve worked more.'”

    Liked by 1 person

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